The Navigator

He set forth, dragging his feet.
Apathetic, unapologetic, and selfish.
On a mission to navigate.
Searching through the maps to find his perfection-
The ideal.
Did he know what angels can turn to after all is lost?
Shame and no self worth.
No rapture, just hellbent worry.
So cut off their wings.
Chain them behind you.
As the clanging, stinging sound makes them weep.
And there I was.
Reluctant to join them, but his eyes made me spellbound.
When the sound of children laughing offers no joyous emotion,
And the beauty of life can not be fulfilled-
It was because the Navigator hid in the shadow of my heart.
He was there, with all his prisoners.
Dragging all their baggage and packing it alongside mine.
I was lost, following his faulty compass.
His quest continued.
Despite my need to turn away, I followed.
Trying to be his transcendence.
Suddenly it was my mission.
I needed to be the red "x" for his destination.
Filling my pockets with magnets, I could make that compass point my direction.
Still my beloved helmsman looked far away.
Is there nothing else I can offer?
I was not her, I am not them, and that seemed to be all that mattered.
Uselessness, trotting along.
Sadness that is seemingly unoticed.
He instead throws little signals along his journey.
And now it is I who drags my tired feet.
All for his bounty and claim.
To be cut free would now leave me aimlessly circling.
Lost without the Navigator, I still have no peace.